Sunday, May 28, 2006

Basic Shaving

Here is the basic equipment (minus mug or backordered scuttle): straight razor, badger bristle shave brush and the SIX DOLLAR shave cream from Target.
Dig this serious Flintstone-like stubble action.
We wet the brush with water as hot as can be.
Just a dab'll do ya.
A few seconds with a searingly hot, soppingly wet towel can do wonders.

If one is mug-less, one can just whip up the lather in the palm of one's hand.

Smear the face with the very hot, tingly lather. (Greetings Google pervs!)

Get good coverage.
And start!
DO NOT EVER BEAR DOWN ON THE BLADE. (Unless you think your cheek looks better detached from your face, or are practicing to perform tracheotomies on rhinos) Light touch. You can hear the blade cutting off whiskers with a "plink." Sorta like "Horton Hears A Who." Make idiotic faces.
Almost done.
Newborn smooth. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

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